I’ve been pondering this subject for some time and have been attempting to write the post since August. I sort have hit a blogging “wall”. I am now asking myself “what purpose would it serve?” I used to find my occasional posts cathartic. Now I worry more about a digital footprint and fall back to “Why bother?” no one reads this stuff, let alone even care what I think.

You hear people all the time saying lamenting “if I could go back and do it all over again”. For the most part, the response is that they wouldn’t do anything different. I find myself wondering if those who wish they could go back in time to change one thing have ever thought about what they are saying about their lives and those in it?

If we could go back in time and change something we did, what sort of ripple effect would it have?

But then it all sort of fits. There really isn’t anything I can do to change what I have done in the past. All the left turns are mine to own.

A while back one of the photographers from high school shared some of the pictures he took during the Senior Trip with a private group on Facebook. There were lots of pictures of a birthday party that I don’t think I attended. If I did, I do not remember going. Then there are a few random shots that appear to be taken from the balcony of his hotel room. Groups of people gathered near the hotel pool. Some notice he is taking pictures and look up, others seem oblivious. For the most part, it just looks like everyone is trying to figure out what to do, where to go. The more I look at the photograph, the more obvious it was symbolic of things to come, almost like the Ghost of Christmas Past.

More symbolism. I call this the “December Daisy” It bloomed around the beginning of December and it’s still hanging in there at the end of the month.

• Cat ramp moved next to my desk in my office – check
• Cell phone ringer on, AirPods in (expecting a number of update calls today) – check
• Odd Playlist playing – check
• Shirt ironed because the way the collar laid was messing with my OCD – check
• Garbage taken out and cans moved to the curb – check
• Chocolate banana mocha made – check
• Heart meds taken – check
• KittyBoy given his pain meds – check
• Cat boxes cleaned – check
• Morning local news on – check
• KittyBoy settled in the other chair – check

My playlist seems to enjoy tormenting me – Adele’s Hello is playing.

Intimidate seems to be too strong a verb. I found this at Vocabulary.com “A pet rat might intimidate your sister’s friends, keeping them out of your fort.” I found it to be a humorous example of the usage of the word but it was an inaccurate verb. Although in the definition of the word another transitive verb stood out – overawe.

The definition of overawe “to restrain or subdue by awe” included the word “restrain”. Of course, my first thoughts were of some sort of physical restraint. Then I thought, the restraint isn’t physical nor does it have to come from the speaker but from the listener.

All of this searching for the right word is to use in a question – have you ever been so overawed by someone that you restrained (held back) from saying what was on your mind?

This is so me, trying to find a “softer” word to describe something.